Dumping Them Out: College Football, Golf Course

Welcome back to another episode of Dumping Them Out. Happy college football season. We're still about two weeks away from the start of the NFL. But we are at least one step closer to finally being done with the internet's annual, "Who Can Prove That They're Most Excited About Football Being BACK" contest. 

Week 0 college football in Dublin, Ireland seems really stupid, both on and beneath the surface. But credit to Ireland. For the last two years, they've kinda delivered. Iowa State vs Kansas State was a competitive game. It was close til basically the end. And first half of football was the perfect amount of hilarious disaster (apparently the rain is MUCH more slippery in Ireland than the United States). 

But it's extremely bullshit that Kansas State and Iowa State, both favorites to win the Big 12, were forced to have THAT be a conference game. When the hell did we start doing conference games in the first week? Maybe I just forget stuff from when I was a kid, but it seems like not that many years ago college football just started opening the season with conference games. That really sucks for the teams who have to play those. I personally love having an important game to watch right off the bat, but for the team's sake, it's pretty fucked up how college football makes them do that.

Now that college football is back, so is my favorite college football tradition. Reading Brandon Walker's replies at the end of the day. The amount of hate he's able to illicit out of his tweets is phenomenal. Yesterday he tweeted a joke about not having a passport. You're gonna have to click into the tweet yourself to read the replies. I was gonna post a few of my favorite and make some jokes, but I'm afraid if I do that I'm going to say something I regret. Something out of pocket like, "This person's reply makes me hope our country gets hit with a nuclear bomb."

I played golf this morning at a course in Dublin, Ohio. The Golf Club of Dublin. It was the first time I had ever played it. It's really a great course. Fantastic greens. It's in great shape. But it's one of those courses that's built inside of a neighborhood. The boldness of some of their holes was just outrageous. Some were ridiculously tight. One hole in particular was the most, "I'm fucking BEGGING you to hit a house" hole I've played in my life. 

It's one thing to have a tight hole with houses on it. But to do it on a hole with a drivable green (and even if you can't actually drive it, 280 is a perfect number that people will convince themselves they can, so they'll swing as reckless as possible)…. AND with water on the left (which if you've ever golfed, you know water on the left makes you subconsciously push everything right).. it was just the perfect recipe for a 250 yard slice right through a window. It's like the built the course hoping it would happen. Those houses along the right must get hit multiple times a day. You'd have to be crazy to live there.

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My friend who I was playing with said he actually broke a window on this hole before. It was barely even a bad shot. He missed right. His drive should have ended up in the rough about 50 yards from the green. But he hit a cart path bounce and the ball bounced straight through a window. And apparently at this course, if you break a window, you're liable to pay for it. So he had to shell out 300 bucks for the broken window. Which really shitty to me. This course is making plenty of money. It's a $100 for 18 holes, and it's always packed. If they're going to build this tight ass public golf course with houses everywhere, the least they could do is pay for the occasional broken window. Or make the people who live on it get insurance that covers such things. I just think if you're going to build on a PUBLIC golf course, you should be forced to take responsibility for that stuff.