The Wiener Drone Is All The Evidence We Need To Know We're Officially In The Future
ChowHound – An Oscar Mayer drone? When pigs fly! Well, now they’re flying—quite literally—in the form of hot dogs with the meat and cold cut company’s latest vehicle: the WienerDrone….
“As the most iconic brand, we’re going where other hot dogs can’t. We’re committed to getting our new hot dog in everyone’s hands – and we knew that was a job for more than just our iconic Wienermobile,” Gred Guidott, Oscar Mayer’s head of marketing, said in a release. “We’ve expanded our Oscar Mayer fleet, ensuring every American can taste the new recipe, because we believe everyone deserves a better hot dog.”
I don’t know how old all of you are. I’m sure there are some of you reading today who are on summer vacation from high school. Maybe others of you out there have kids of your own who are home on summer vacation from high school. It’s regardless. Because think back to generations before you. Think about the world they were living in. Back in those days, there was a revolutionary vehicle called the Oscar Mayer WienerMobile. A mode of transportation lightyears ahead of its time. Cars that are made in the shape of a giant hot dog. How hilarious is that? It’s fucking priceless. And does that mean the WinerMobile is a sandwich? Buddy, we may never know.
But gone are the days of the past. We’re in 2017, people. We have drugs that make your dick hard for days, we have phones that allow you to merely swipe to the left and instantly have somebody to bang, and we have an entire Oscar Mayer WienerFleet.
Complete, of course, with the Oscar Mayer WienerDrone. Try telling your grandfather about that one. A giant unsuspecting wiener flying high above the sky. Carpet-bombing dogs all across America. North Korea can’t even figure out how to launch a fucking missile and we’ve got a giant dick flying 1,500 feet in the air clocking in at 50 mph.
Also–tell me this doesn’t look like Phil Kessel’s version of the Bat Cave. Here, I’ll make it a little easier for you to picture.
